Gutandukana kw’abakundanye birababaza, cyane cyane iyo atari wowe biturutseho ukabona uwo wakundaga agutaye. Menya ariko ko niba uwo mwashwanye ari we ubona nka we wenyine mukwiranye, wagenewe, hakiri amahirwe ko yahindukira mugasubirana.
Muri iyi nkuru turakwereka inzira zo kugarura umukunzi wawe. Ubumwe.com bwifashishije ubushakashatsi butandukanye, bwaguteguriye .
Mbere na mbere, mugishwana ,banza umuhe akayaga !
Ikintu cya mbere ugomba kwirinda mu gihe uwo wakundaga agutaye, ni ukumubuza amahoro, umwereka amarira, usa nk’usabiriza urukundo. Ahubwo ikiruta ni ukumuha amahoro, ukacyira ibikubayeho kigabo , ukamuha umwanya wo kuba nawe yatecyereza ku cyemezo yafashe.
Uti ibyo bizamara iki ?
Ibyo bizatuma uwari umukunzi wawe ashima iyo myifatire werekanye, akubahire uburyo ubyakiye bupfura mu buryo butagutesheje agaciro.
Ibintu rero ugomba kwirinda :
Kumutera rwaserera, kurira, no kumwereka uburakari . Ibyo ntacyo bizakugezaho ahubwo ndetse bishobora gutuma aguhungira kure.
Mu kwacyira icyemezo cye utuje, bizamutera kugira amatsiko yo kumenya impamvu ibyo bitakubabaje, kuko aribyo yari yiteguye , bitume atangira gushidikanya yibaza niba icyemezo yafashe cyari gifite ishingiro.
Hagarika imishyikirano (itumanaho) yose yabahuzaga.
Nyuma yo gushwana kw’abakundanye, amarangamutima aba agifite ubukana cyane, akenshi bigatuma umuntu afata ibyemezo bidakwiye.Niyo mpamvu rero ari byiza guhagarika imishyikirano n’umukunzi wawe mu gihe runaka
Bityo rero:
-Wimubuza amahoro umutelefona cyangwa umwoherereza sms , cyangwa e mails buri kanya. Tegereza ko ari we uguhamagara bwa mbere.
-Biragoye, ariko hagarika kugirana nawe imishyikirano nibura mu gihe cyo kuva ku byumweru bibiri kugera kuri bitatu.Muhe uwo mwanya wo kugukumbura.
Muhane umwanya wo gukira ibikomere.
Gushwana bishobora gokomeretsa: amagambo abantu baterana ashobora gukomeretsa amarangamutima.Mugomba guhana umwanya wo kugira ngo mutuze, mutekereze neza nyuma mubashe gukira.Nyuma yaho nibwo mwakongera gutekereza gusubukura umubano.
Guhita musubirana nyuma yo gushwana, bishobora gutuma inkovu zitarakira zongera gukomereka ku buryo ibyo mukora mugerageza gusana bishobora kuba impfabusa.
-Tegereza ko igihe gihagije kinyuraho ku buryo mu gihe mwakongera kuvugana, inzika n’umujinya bitahita bibyuka kubera kwibuka ibyabaye.
Suzuma witonze ibyerekeranye n’urukundo rwanyu
Wa mwanya wafashe wahagaritse imishyikirano wukoreshe mu gutekereza ku mubano wanyu uko wari umeze, wibuke ibitaragendaga neza, n’ibyagendaga neza mu mubano wanyu. Utekereze neza nta kwishuka , umenye neza ibibazo byatumaga umubano utagenda neza, urebe niba byabonerwa igisubizo.
Niba ubona ko ibibazo bibatanya bishobora kubonerwa umuti, kandi ukabona ko ari wowe ari we mwiteguye gukora igisabwa cyose ngo bikemuke, icyo gihe haba hari amahirwe ko urukundo rwanyu rwagaruka.
Ariko niba ubona ko impamvu zabateye gushwana zisa nkizitahinduka, ukabona kandi mutiteguye gukora uko mushoboye kose ngo bihinduke, icyo gihe birashoboka ko kongera gusubirana ataba ari cyo cyemezo gikwiye gufatwa.Muri ibyo kandi ntukoreshe amaranga mutima gusa, ahubwo koresha no gushyira mu gaciro, ukoresheje ubwenge.
Saba imbabazi niba ari cyo gikwiye.
Mu gihe mwashwanaga birashoboka ko waba waravuze utabitekereje amagambo mabi akomeretsa ubu ukaba uyicuza. Igihe ntikijya kirenga cyo kwicuza no gusaba imbabazi
Niba gutandukana byaraturutse ku migirire yawe, muri icyo gihe ugomba gutera intambwe ya mbere ugasaba imbabazi. Uwo mwakundanye ashobora gushima icyo gikorwa akaba yakugarurira umutima mwiza, no kukumva.
-Nta na rimwe uzashobora kwibagirwa ibyashize ngo ubyikuremo mu gihe uzaba utaremera amakosa yawe.
Hari ubushakashatsi buvuga ko ari byiza ku mukobwa ko uwo mwakundanaga yakubonana n’undi musore, ibyo bikaba byamutera gufuha no kugira icyifuzo cyo kukugarukira. Ibyo nabyo birashoboka uretse ko ugomba kubikora witonze, kuko hari igihe umukunzi wawe yabona umerewe neza cyane hamwe n’undi akabifata nkaho byarangiye nawe akishakira undi.
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